Overall Rating: ⭐⭐⭐

“I have never purposely hurt anything. I have never hurt anyone. Until today.”

This book has been on my Kindle for AGES, and seeing as I want 2024 to be the year I actually make a dent in my back log, I thought this one would be a nice short read to start with! While an interesting book with such an unexpected ending, I think I was craving a little more from it personally, but I really think it’s the type of book that anyone can pick up and feel curious about! Still super happy to be sharing my first review of the year for A Confession.

About the book

How far would you go to clear your own conscience? Would you destroy another’s integrity purely to ensure your own absolution? In ‘A Confession,’ we are confronted by a man who’s reached the limit of what even he can rationalize as within the limits of his own morality. Having reached his breaking point, he reaches out in desperation to purify his own conscience, spilling the secrets of his life that have formed the man he has become – even if doing so means destroying others in the process.

In this modern tale of amorality, William F. Aicher takes us through the memories of a man who, while having lived a life of confident righteousness, now questions the very fiber of which he is made. Taking inventory of a life defined by substance abuse, love, sex, politics and a newfound ease of inflicting public shame with the help of social media, ‘A Confession’ invites the reader to take a seat and listen to a man come to grips with his own secrets.

As these truths are exposed, the rationality and logic behind them begins to unfurl, leaving both the narrator and reader ultimately questioning if indeed any of us can claim to be truly good.

The beginning

I knew this book would be something different as soon as I read the first few paragraphs. It’s written in such a unique way that I felt completely mesmerised! The narrator speaks to the reader directly, like you’ve been summoned to listen to a mysterious stranger with secrets, things that said stranger wants to confess. It felt half personal diary, half fiction, and I was here for it! I instantly pictured myself sitting in a darkened room with this guy, acting as a kind of crutch, someone for this stranger to unload all the sins of his life onto without judgement. I quite enjoyed the danger at the start, the darkness of this person’s life, and it felt something of a privilege for this person to be confiding in me. It all felt scarily real, but that’s what made it come alive, and it was written so well. With each chapter that passed, we got to know even more about the life this person has lived, and I found myself wanting to learn his deepest and darkest secrets.

“The mirror I hold is cracked and flawed, for it is but my own perception. It’s only through the eyes of others that I can see myself clearly.”

The author really grabs you with descriptions of sights and smells and sounds. To be honest, the whole tone was excellent. There were quite a few chapters which came across as someone complaining about how other people live their lives and giving his opinions on certain types of people and situations. I expected this to become stale very quickly, but at this point at least, it actually became pretty thought provoking, changing the type of book I expected it to be. I felt like there were things I could relate to, as well as views I didn’t agree with, but the balance was great and had me thinking about life and incidents in a whole new way. However, as time went on, it felt a bit like a big old moan and it didn’t really feel as though the book had any structure. Whether this was intentional here, I wasn’t sure, but I quickly began to feel confused and unaware of the point of it all. I wanted more interesting confessions, not this guy’s generic life story. I hoped things would pick up!

The middle

We get to know more about the narrator’s personal life, from jobs to relationships, addiction to politics, and I expected this was just laying the foundations to lead up to something bigger. The pacing felt quite slow in parts, and I was craving a twist, or something more dangerous like we read in that first chapter. The book’s synopsis promised that this stranger would be spilling his secrets, but a lot of what we were told up to this point didn’t feel like secrets to me. I needed more excitement! This person begins to almost trample over others to get ahead, and I can’t say I liked him very much. But saying that, I don’t think we’re meant to! However, I did quite like how much of a snake he became after what he did when he found out his wife had cheated on him, how he turned things around to benefit him and his life. This guy was turning into someone you wouldn’t want to mess with, or get on the wrong side of!

“I am not a broken man, although you may see me as such. I simply am. I have accepted my wholeness and existence. Every part of me is my own.”

I picked out so many quotes from this book that were just great and sure made me think. Things like, ‘Keep your mind focused on the present, and the terror of existence goes unnoticed.’ Absolute *chef’s kiss*. This author sure can write, and there were multiple times I came across a sentence like this and was quietly impressed. Even though the book didn’t really excite me up to now, the writing was a huge reason for me to want to continue until the end. It was just so good. It helped that the author’s writing itself was engrossing because the way the narrator often goes off on a tangent here had me doing some serious eye-rolling. As he finally recalls what felt like every last detail of his past, we finally get to present day events which made me think that this was where things would get exciting… hopefully!

The end

The story of a recent relationship with a younger woman was the point where we really see a shift in this character, something that made me sit up a little straighter and take note of every word. Was a huge confession about to be revealed? Were we finally going to get a twist or something shocking after listening to this guy moan about everything and anything for so long? I could have quite literally read an entire book based on this relationship. I think if it was explored so much further, it would be an absolutely brilliant story. A deeper story of how they met, how their relationship started, changed, ended. And everything in between! There is quite a big life event here which changed so much for the narrator, and I think I just wanted more of it personally. It felt skimmed over, when it is actually such a huge part of the story. Still, it was a great addition.

“Can you smell it? The sorrow on my breath. It lingers, hanging like a cloud as the words tumble from within.”

I came to the conclusion that the narrator was certainly an overthinker, and definitely went into unnecessary detail in order to answer a pretty simple question, ‘Am I good?’ The majority of the points he made which made him think he was a bad person could literally have happened to any person on this earth. Merely coincidental. Does that mean every single one of us is bad too? No, absolutely not. I feel he made himself a ‘bad’ person right at the very end which really could have easily been avoided if he was in a good frame of mind to begin with. I thought the author had completely nailed the dark atmosphere though, and again, I was hanging onto every word. The ending chapter was brilliant; it was shocking, sudden and completely took my breath. Despite this not being the book I’d hoped, I will absolutely be picking up more of this author’s work and I’m confident I’ll find the book for me! I do recommend you try it – it might be for you!

Overall thoughts

A Confession is a thought-provoking and completely unusual account of a man exploring his conscience, questioning his morality and taking the reader on a super immersive journey through his life. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever read before; the reader really feels like a character in the book, and an important one at that! At times, I felt as though I didn’t really see the point in the things the narrator told us, and the pacing was sometimes slow, but the vocabulary used and the atmosphere the author creates was brilliant. The ending was also pretty haunting! I did find his exploration of whether he was a good person to be insightful and something I found myself thinking about a lot. I just felt like I was craving more from this. A very different read that I’m sure many will love!

If you’re curious, you can grab your own copy of A Confession on Amazon, available on Kindle or in paperback. Make sure you’re following the author over on Twitter and Instagram for updates!

Looking for book reviews?

If you’re in need of reviews for your own book, do get in touch to get on my submissions list! All the information you need is on my book reviews page. If you enjoyed this review and would like to support my blog, you can buy me a coffee 😊